I need help with training my daughter. The only time she goes is when she is really relaxed (naptime and night sleeping). I have her sit on the "potty" after she gets up, before nap, before bed at night and anytime she wants to but there has been nothing. Does it take along time for them to get the hang of it or is she still too young?
6 comments:
How old is your daughter? I have found that you have to let them show interest and take the lead. If you want it to happen and she isn't in to it, you'll end up dragging it out for a year. If you let it wait till you can see she is communicating that she gets the concept, it will be less trama for you and her. Every couple months you can try for three days and if its not working then wait another couple months. I'm right in the middle of potty training my second son.
Good advice from Amber! With my first I tried a couple of times and the waited until she showed more interest, and deticated a week to not going ANYWHERE, only wearing panties or nothing, potty treats and juice gallore and whalla it worked. It is so hard though because my second was potty trained and then we moved and now she always has poop accidents! UGGH! I guess I need help to on what to do with the pantypooper!! Goodluck. Potty training is my least favorite Mom job!
What finally worked for my daughter was the ability to communicate. If she couldn't communicate to me that she needed to go potty, then it was more like I was the one being trained instead of her. But I understand that there has to be some kind of connection in their brain about what they actually do on the potty. It took my daughter a long, long time to accept that it was okay to pee in the toilet. It's like it's a scary thing, but once she did it one time, she understood (and I made a huge deal out of it).
After that, it was all about the right incentives to keep her peeing on the toilet. For my daughter, it was her "dancing princess dress" that she'd get to wear when she used the potty (and had to take off if she had an accident). This daughter is my difficult one, by the way, so I started putting her on the toilet when she was 18 months (and it was a good thing, because she needed lots of practice so she wouldn't throw the largest screaming fit in all of history every time), but she wasn't actually potty trained until she was two years and nine months. It was pretty easy when she was that old, and I probably could have bit the bullet and done it easily a few months before that, too, but I was pregnant and less than mobile.
I have a sister-in-law who potty trained all of her kids by the time they were two years old (her first one by 18 months). It was a lot of work for her and I would never be dedicated enough to do what she did. Diapering is just easier sometimes.
I am just now sitting my daughter (started about at 16 months she is 17 months now) on the toilet and I sing a "pee pee in the potty" song. I truly believe that it is something that can't be forced, it will make them turn off or tune out on it. Right now she would rather bite the potty toilet ring than pee pee in it. I will continue to sit her on it and I get her used to it. I normally set her on it right after her naps and sing, pee pee in the potty and say yea! She gets excited so I will wait! Robyn is right, the incentive thing works wonders, I have seen it in a few of my friends kids. It is easier sometimes to put a diaper on them and deal with it when the communication is clearer. My 17 month old thinks I like sitting on her potty and singing, that it about it. She doesn't understand that there are other alternatives to the diaper yet! One day!
My best advice would be to let her decide when she wants to do it. Make it no pressure at all. I did this with my kids and it was great. One day they just decided they were ready, they just started doing it themselves. My girl was just under 3 and my boy was just over 3 years old. I seriously didn't have to lift a finger. Except of course to wipe after pooping. They weren't old enough to do that. I talked about it with them from the time they first showed interest and I made sure there was a stool to the toilet and a little seat on it for them, so they could try whenever they wanted, but I never made them try to go. I let them lead and it was SO little effort. The see their friends and siblings and parents going and (when they are old enough to understand it)they decide that they want to do it too and that's all it takes.
My take on it is this: I would MUCH rather change diapers for an extra 6 or 8 months or even a year and have my kids learn on their terms than pressure them into it and end up cleaning up accidents for the next 2 years.
Oh- a couple other things. Pull-ups are pretty much useless. Don't waste your money. They are glorified diapers and I have yet to meet a kid that has made good use of them while potty training. The kids don't know a difference between them and a diaper.
I'd advise not bothering with the little potty chairs. They are yucky to clean and I've talked to moms that say their kids wouldn't use a regular toilet, only their potty seat. One mom said she kept one in her car because her daughter wouldn't go on ANYTHING else ever. Can you imagine running out to the car in the middle of a shopping trip and then having to clean it up or leave it in your car? Gross. Poor lady. Obviously some moms have success with them, but I say why bother when they need to learn to use a real toilet anyway?
Wow- I guess I had a lot to say. Sorry this is so long.
Thanks for all the post! Getting your advise is better than anything I've read online. I'm really not forcing the training. Most days she asked to sit on her potty and just chat and sometimes she does something....
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