Sunday, February 10, 2008

The Birds and the Bees Revisited

My LDS friend here told me that her daughter was riding the bus and saw a teenager looking at a baby magazine. The daughter asked the teenager why she was looking at it. The teenager said, "Because I am having a baby." The daughter said, "Oh, are you getting married?" The teenager said, "No, I am having a baby with my boyfriend. We having been trying to make a baby for a while. We want to have a baby so bad." Has it suddenly become cool for teenagers to have babies? (Darn you, Jamie Lynn Spears!)

Aidan told me that he found the "s" word in the dictionary at school. I thought he meant sh--. So I told him that it meant poop and that we didn't use that word for it. Collin explained why swear words are swear words because they disrespect our bodies and bodily functions and how God created our bodies and so when we swear we are disrespecting God as well. 

Emma said, "Sex means poop?" And then she said, "Sex and the City," a couple times. I have no idea where she heard that because we don't watch that show. Anyway, then we had to explain what sex was to all our kids because they had the whole sex is poop idea. So we got out a children's anatomy book and showed them where things go and the book also had a picture of a sperm entering an egg. The kids asked what happens if a man pees inside a woman or vice versa and we explained that it usually doesn't happen. We also told them never to discuss sex with anyone else besides Collin and me. We told them that they can't try it until they are married. We told them that after murder, sex between unmarried people is the next biggest sin because it has to do with creation. 

There was so laughing and embarrassment. Aidan felt so embarrassed that he was covering his face with his hands and turning away from the table. Emma just had a huge goofy smile on her face. Ian announced that when he was a baby he drank milk from my boobs. But the house didn't fall down on top of us and the kids didn't spend the rest of the night talking about sex.

I know some of you don't approve of telling kids about sex at a young age, but our kids were already hearing about it and getting weird ideas that needed to be clarified. For us it felt like the right time to discuss it. I think if we take some of the taboo, mystery, away it won't seem like such a big deal. I guess we just tried to make it part of a normal conversation.

I think this is going to ruin my uptight, business-like reputation:)


4 comments:

Grammy A said...

My first recollection of having the sex talk was with Aaron when he was pretty young, too. He was repeating some sex jokes or words he'd heard in elementary school, and I thought I should clarify a few things. We have always been very open about the topic in our family... right girls? I say that to Tara, Steph, Kirst, and Katy. I was ALWAYS able to ask my mom anything, and I wanted my kids to feel comfortable talking about it with me, too. I would much rather give that information to my children, than to have someone else teach them from their own perspective... especially if it doesn't go along with my values. Hey... who WANTS to give that talk! I think most parents know when it's the right time, and you need to do it when you feel prompted, and not wait.

Stephanie said...

If your children are starting to investigate or ask questions about sex, it is def. time to share a LITTLE on the subject, giving the appropriate age. It's just very sad that you've had to do it so young. The kids these days!!!!!

The thing you don't want is to have your child hear things from school that go against what you teach at home.. Children are very misleading (only because they think they know what they're are talking about). So if you need to clarify things as a parent, then so be it.

I'm sure some parents would attack this subject differently. But that's there way of parenting, and they're entiled to dealing with it as they wish. That's the beauty of different parenting styles. We all love and want whats best for our children.

Mical said...

Tara, you crack me up. I totally can picture you and Collin having that conversation with them. That scares me to death. I guess I better think about what I am going to say when that topic finally comes up at my house. Ugh!

Stephanie said...

It was NOT us! I promise you that.